Outside Looking In: Chapel Window (for Dawn)
Sandra
Florence
I thought about you tonight
looking through the chapel window
your image came back to me
on a ribbon of black,
You were in foster care with my aunt.
Your mother came long enough to make
you cry and then was gone again
a uniform and auburn hair.
My aunt could not love you
you cried too much
and were so still
so hurt at two.
hold me, you said putting your arms up
reaching
I still think of it your blonde hair and red cheeks
the picture of health
and yet,
I picked you up and held you
but I was only thirteen,
perhaps not old enough to love you
though I want to believe that I did.
I can see you through the chapel window
I'm outside looking in.
The windows of the chapel are brightly lit with candles
words dance on the trails of pungent smoky incense
there are prayer books children moving softly to the altar I see you
among them
As if you belong to something for the first time.
This is an offering for you, Dawn
There is no window separating us now the chapel receives
both of us from lost time a child and a writer a poem and a prayer.
Acknowledgments--Carol Cribbet-Bell for "trails of pungent smoky air" and
Penny Spicer for "ribbon of black"
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